


Regrets of Gods

by Wywrd_Artemis



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Canon, Dream Smp, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Not Beta Read, OOC backstory, au where being a server owner is literally being a god, god!badboyhalo, i tagged it as romantic bcz shipper brain does not turn off oops, munchy mc, skephalo can be read as platonic or romantic, this is pretty much just a what-if fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:06:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28435107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wywrd_Artemis/pseuds/Wywrd_Artemis
Summary: Dream is the god of Dream SMP, but based on the things he's done, he's not a very popular god.Badboyhalo is one of the few people who understands.A little drabble about having too much power :)
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), GeorgeNotFound & Darryl Noveschosch, Zak Ahmed & Darryl Noveschosch, Zak Ahmed/Darryl Noveschosch
Comments: 9
Kudos: 200
Collections: Wywrd's Skephalo Fics





	Regrets of Gods

**Author's Note:**

> alright this fic probably wont make sense bcz its just a stream of consciousness "what-if" that i threw together in under an hour

“You know,” Badboyhalo said, looking out at the sunset. “I feel bad for Dream.”

Skeppy gave Bad a sideways glance, shaking his head. “Dude, really? He’s been doing some real fucked up stuff.”

“Language,” Bad said, scooting forward so his legs dangled off the edge of the roof. “But I do feel bad for him. Being the god of a world is a lot of pressure.”

Skeppy straightened up, tilting his head to the side. “That’s right. You were a god too, weren’t you?”

Bad smiled, the soft pinks and blues casting his expression in a nostalgic overlay. “Yep, Munchy MC. Believe it or not, I was a lot like Dream for a while.”

Skeppy chuckled, elbowing Bad. “You? The softest most wholesome muffin in the world? Please, I doubt you ever killed anyone.” The silence that followed was… telling. “Bad? You didn’t, right?”

Bad sighed, resting his head on Skeppy’s shoulder, not meeting his eyes. “When you become a god, you’re given a world to do whatever you want with. You can change anything. The laws of physics, the shape of reality, anything can be done just because you want to. You’re given a world to shape into something special. You control everything. Everything except the people.

“And it’s frustrating! You try to make a world where everyone can get along, or everyone can have fun, or some other good intention, but then people just, do whatever they want,” Bad continued, his expression softening. “And by then you’re so used to controlling everything. You’re trying to make something good. You’re making something good for _them_. So if your powers can’t make people do what you want, you find other ways. People are unique and strange and messy, and so if they don’t fit the world you’re creating, you try to break them until they _do_ fit.”

Bad closed his eyes, hiding the dampness there as old memories bubbled to the surface. “It was a long, long time ago, but I did some things I’m not proud of. I’ve never met a god who hasn’t.”

Hesitantly, Skeppy wrapped his arms around Bad, pulling him into a gentle embrace. He’d met Bad in Munchy MC, he’d known him for years, and he’d never seemed like anything but a complete softy who loved his friends. “Bad…” he said softly, resting his chin on Bad’s head. “That doesn’t sound anything like you. You’re not like that.”

“But I was,” Bad whispered. “I used to be.”

“Not anymore,” Skeppy said, shaking his head. “That’s not who you are now. You changed.”

Bad buried his face in Skeppy’s side, leaning into the embrace. It felt like a lifetime passed before he spoke again, his voice soft as though being too loud might awaken sleeping demons of his past. “It was a different world, an open world. It was growing, constantly, hundreds of new people every day. I want to say I stopped being controlling because I realized what I was doing, but it just… it became too much. Even when I set up automated systems and appointed mods, I realized the world had become too big for me to control anymore. It was terrifying. It was a relief.

“I backed off for a long time. I hid away from the world, only ever talking to staff and doing basic maintenance. And the world flourished. All I had wanted was to create a place people could go to be happy, and it felt as though it didn’t work until /I/ was out of the picture.” Bad opened his eyes, glancing up at Skeppy. “That’s why I feel bad for Dream. When you become a god, the world you’re given is your purpose. You have every power possible, and still, you can’t make everyone happy. Living that way, it’s hard to stay the ‘good guy’ for long.”

Although they had always been close, Skeppy realized this was the most open Bad had ever been with him. He felt a bittersweet warmth that Bad trusted him with what was clearly a painful part of his history. “So, what changed?” he asked, nudging Bad lightly. “You weren’t a power hungry control freak when I met you. Maybe just a little jealous ‘n’ clingy.”

“I am not jealous!” Bad stuttered. “I just don’t like my friends to spend time with other people instead of me!”

Skeppy laughed, glad to have cracked the tension if only just a bit. “Suuuure.”

Bad sighed, fighting back a small smile. “Well, the world getting too big to control definitely changed things, but it didn’t make me a better person. It just made me feel kind of… small, helpless, you know? Like I was a failure. So I hid away from everything. But somehow, someone who /wasn’t/ a mod found me.

“At first I was just frustrated, because I thought I just wanted to be alone. But he was so stubborn! He kept coming to visit me, telling me about his adventures around Munchy MC, insisting I come play minigames with him. And then one day, I said yes.” Bad’s eyes lit up, his tone warm and nostalgic.

“It was like learning to be a person again. I had to learn to talk to people. Learn to make friends. Learn to find happiness in the little things. I think I’d forgotten how much I loved that world. Seeing it up close, from the eyes of a player, that was my wake up call. Healing was slow, and there were some days where I’d just curl up and hide from the world. But little by little, I met new people. I got to know my mods, and to be friends with them. And I realized that even if the world I made wasn’t perfect, even if it wasn’t everything I’d dreamed, it was beautiful, flaws and all.”

Bad sat up, looking at Skeppy with a smile. “If it weren’t for that player, I wouldn’t have been ready for you. By the time you came, I’d been working on being better for so long. It was like you were there just to push my buttons and test me!” he teased. “But after meeting you, I realized I was finally ready to let go. It was a long, slow, hard change, but I’m really glad it happened.”

Skeppy wouldn’t admit it out loud, but he was glad too. Where would he be now if not for his best friend? “So who’s this ‘player’ that dragged you out of your hole, huh? Should I be jealous?”

Bad giggled, shaking his head. “What? No, you muffin! Actually, uh, you know him. It’s George.” His smile faded, replaced with the hurt of before. “It’s probably part of why he’s always making excuses for Dream. George saved me, so he’s convinced he can save Dream too. I hope he’s right. I hope Dream isn’t past the point of saving.”

“You make being a god sound really bad,” Skeppy said, throwing an arm around Bad’s shoulder. “If I ever had the chance to become a god, I would simply say no thank you. Too much responsibility, eugh.”

Bad smiled, putting his arm around Skeppy’s waist. “You’re such a dumb potato,” he said softly, leaning into the sidehug, watching the last light of the sunset wink out beneath the horizon, leaving only a faint strawberry gradient in its wake. The two boys stayed there on the roof for a long time, sitting arm-in-arm, both reflecting silently on the price that came with godhood.

**Author's Note:**

> look i just love badboyhalo a lot this little potato muffin makes me So Happy <3<3<3


End file.
